Sunday, June 15, 2008
Father's Day -- "Self Control"

But the fruit of the spirit is…self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).

A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard.
Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right
thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red
light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in
frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection,
dropping her cell phone and makeup.

As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up
into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to
exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she
was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.
After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the
door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer
was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your
car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you,
and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do'
bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' License plate holder, the 'Follow Me to
Sunday-School' bumper Sticker, And the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, Naturally...I assumed you had stolen the car."

Today’s sermon is all-about self-control. Self-control is a hallmark of the Christian life. It is the last spiritual fruit and the icing on the cake. It is that pinnacle of the faith, the pinnacle reached due to the power of Christ inside and outside.

But the fruit of the spirit is…self-control.
I think if I were not a pastor, I would be a history teacher. I love history, particularly American History, particularly the civil war and presidential history. During his term as President of the U.S., Lyndon Johnson was somewhat overweight. One day his wife challenged him with this blunt assertion: "You can't run the country if you can't run yourself." Respecting Mrs. Johnson's wise observation, the President lost 23 pounds. That is self-control. Allow me to take it one step further. Are you the master of you, or is God the master of you?
Self-control is the Greek “enkrateia” – literally it means in strength – having power over – being the master of. It is the quality that gives victory over fleshly desires and which is closely related to chastity both in mind and in conduct.

(Prov 25:28 NIV) Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.

There are three things we need to do if we wish to maintain self-control:

1. Guard your eyes

The eyes are the windows to the soul! This is critical. Particularly for men, whom God made very visual beings!

What you see is what you get! Whatever you feed your soul by way of your eyes is what will be in control of you. Feed your eyes with pure sights, you will have purity. Feed your eyes with impure images, you will become impure.

But pastor, I can’t help what I see! You might be surprised how much you can actually filter away from your eyes.

Jesus had something to say about our eyes men:

Job gave us a prescription, when he said, (Job 31:1 NIV) "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.”

He made a binding agreement with his eyes. A biblical covenant is a two-way agreement, which depends upon one who is stronger to help keep the agreement. Job, with God’s help, was going to guard his eyes!

This is so opposite of what society tells us to do. Society says it is ok to feast our eyes upon whatever we wish, food, people, and things. The Bible says guard your eyes. Jesus said, (Mat 5:28 NIV) But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Oh boy, preacher, you’ve done it now! You’ve gone from preaching to meddling. And beyond that, what you are saying is impossible! No its not. It is one thing to notice attractiveness. It is quite another to want to use a body for selfish gain. Sometimes, because men are so visually oriented, that is exactly what happens in the minds eye.

Let’s go back to Job. Job determined to not let his eyes wonder and his mind to linger so that lust would not have a foothold. Men, we can do this by keeping our eyes focused on a person’s face or the back of their heads. Don’t give your eyes permission to wander. You can train yourself to do that. It will take about 21 days to form a habit, the experts say.

2. Guard your mind

If the eyes are the windows to the soul, the mind is the door to the heart. Our problem, men and women, boys and girls, is that we can build a stronghold in our minds. It starts with one small decision at time, and builds as we give more space to thinking certain thoughts. These thoughts can be good thoughts or not so good thoughts. The walls are built, though, by the time and energy we give to thinking them so that strongholds are present. Your stronghold could be a good thing like family priorities, church ministries, and job performance. They can also be bad things like lust, food addiction, and gossip.

British statesman Edmund Burke argued, "men are qualified for civil liberty in exact proportion to their disposition to put moral chains on their own appetites. Society cannot exist unless a controlling power upon will and appetite be placed somewhere, and the less of it there is within, the more there is without. It is ordained in the eternal constitution of things that men of intemperate minds cannot be free. Their passions forge their fetters." Imprimis, Vol. 20, No. 9.

The first step to addressing negative strongholds is to recognize their existence. The second step to addressing negative strongholds is to speak the word of truth to them. If your problem is food addiction, speak the holy word to it: Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.” If your problem is gossip, “(1 Th 5:11 NIV) Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing” and “(Mat 12:36 NIV) But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken.”



3. Guard your company

Finally, guard your company. If you are more likely to drink in a crowd, avoid the crowd that encourages that behavior. If you are more likely to put others down when you are part of the pack, avoid the pack that encourages that behavior. If your friend goes on an egging spree, go on a sitting spree in your house. If your workgroup gathers in the break room to catch up on the latest gossip, take your break somewhere else. Guard your company. It is your life. It is your right. Don’t worry so much about popularity. It is more important to be popular with God than with people! In sports, when you defeat or outmaneuver an opponent, sometimes the more agile person will taunt the one who was beaten with “Who’s your Daddy?” I have always been a proponent of letting your game speak for you. Our goal is to please God, not people. Who’s your Daddy? I hope your answer is “God Almighty.” Maybe your relationship with your earthly father is not what it should be, or maybe worse, volatile, or even non-existent. Your heavenly father wants to be your eternal father; he will never refrain from loving you!

Seek those groups that encourage you and build you up in the things of God! Men, this is vital. We cannot – cannot – cannot make it alone. That is why Jesus gathered disciples. That is why John Wesley gathered lay preachers. That is why Bill began Promise Keepers. Men, we must gather together around our common bond in Christ and encourage and pray for each other. Wives, children, parents and in-laws, you pray for us, too. We desperately need you to pray for us.

I have thought a bit about what the church could you fathers today as a keepsake in honor of father’s day. I am going to take a cue from Dr. Walter Kimbrough, the featured preacher and conference last week. If you are a dad, please stand up! I feel very led to ask your family and your friends to pray for you – to pray for your example as a godly man, to pray for you to overcome sin, to pray for the power of the holy spirit to be greatly at work in you. If you have a father or a friend standing right now, would you slip out of your seat and come to the altar for this man. I want you to come and pray. Maybe you would want to pray out loud. Maybe you would want to pray quietly. I will close with a prayer. Come. We need you! Come.